Lets talk about being bitchy

I've been wanting to write this post for a while now...The only thing that has been stopping me is that by writing this post I'll probably be seen as coming across a little bitchy...and I've decided that that's fine actually, because I can be a bitch, I know it and I'm not afraid to admit it. I also know that being a bitch usually does more harm than good, and after I've been a little bitchy I don't feel any better for it.

Let's start it off on a light note, according to my friends I'm a "basic bitch" for the following reasons:
I can sing to every song on the radio. Yes I can!
I talk about Yoga/any form of exercise really (but I do go)
Weekends consist of netflix/movies and wine.
I love Ryan Gosling...hahaha yup!
I have a shit ton of scarves. Aaha, it was so hard leaving more than half of them in Johannesburg!
I'm obsessed with Paris. At least now I have gone, but yes, still obsessed!
I have/had quotes all over my house.
I quote "Mean Girls" - guilty. And it goes with this post so prepare yourself!
I love frozen yoghurt and scented candles. Guilty again.
I have brightly coloured under garments. Too many!
Things I'd we'd say in a normal conversation include..."Cray", "Totes", "I love Katy Perry" and we always throw in a little "Swag, swag, swag" for Riaan just because he hates it so much! Haha!

When I look at this list I really don't see a problem with being a "basic bitch", I like who I am. Also, I'm a feminist at heart. But I'm not here to talk about me...I'm also not here to talk about the "bitches" that are blunt, straightforward, speak their mind and generally don't take shit from anyone. Being nice gets you nowhere, as a woman you need to stand your ground and stand up for what you believe in. But if that's what you're going to do then do it consistently, all the time. Not just when it's easy.

I'm here to talk about the girls that are snide, mean, hateful and malevolent. Towards each other. We live in a world where people seem to think it's OK to bring other people down to make them feel better about themselves, girls especially. When did it become OK to intentionally try and hurt someone? Is it really worth all the effort you put into it? What do you gain from it?

Society has set us up to constantly compare ourselves to one another, but instead of making a snide remark like "Oh she's so fat!" or "She should eat a burger!" take a second and think about what you are about to say...

Why?? Why would you, being a girl, knowing how hard it is to get through a day with your sanity intact, being constantly judged based on how you look, what you say, what you wear, what you eat and what you do to name a few things, think/feel that it is okay to make another girls day a little harder by taking a dig at them? I am perplexed! I just don't get it!

We could take a tip from the guy's here - they just say whatever it is that's pissing them off, they have it out and then they apologise and most times they get over it. This may seem a little testosteroney and somewhat primitive, but I still feel that it's a better way of handling a problem than by being ambiguous, deceitful and spiteful. I'm not saying bring out the claws, I'm saying get it out there and get it over with!!

Regina George, why can't Gretchen Wiener wear gold hoop earrings? Because you wore them first, of course! BUT you were NOT the first person EVER to wear gold hoop earrings!! SERIOUSLY!!! It seems to me that some girls get stuck in "high school", they just don't get past being cliquey or being a bitch behind your back and playing nice to your face. Just like in Mean Girls, the whole "I love your skirt" and "You can't wear gold hoop earrings" scenes happen over and over every day!! Why?? Why is it OK for you to do that? What makes you better than that girl? What makes you think you have the right to deprive someone of something they enjoy/like or hate on someone for liking something that you generally don't like, or god forbid, you liked first?

This is a serious problem that people face, not just girls, everyone! People are always so brave when they are hiding behind a keyboard and a screen, but 9 times out of 10 if you take that away from them they'll have nothing to say.

So now I have to quote Mean Girls, you leave me no choice - "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter, and ruining [my friend's] life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you."

I know I have been guilty of  being a bitch, I belonged to a clique in high school. Luckily we left the bitchiness in high school and I have made the choice to stop being bitchy. I learned that you need to be happy with who and where you are in your life, do what makes you happy, be with those that make you happy and most importantly be yourself. It's highly likely that the problem isn't with the person you are berating, judging and breaking down.

So I leave you with this...

Rant over.